I was binge watching Hometown cha cha cha by my favourite Korean actor, Kim Seon Ho, these last 2 days. Oh yes, definitely I wouldn’t miss the charming Mr. Dimple. Hometown cha cha cha for me is about us seeking comfort in our own home, that is ourselves.

Yet, that’s not what I am going to share here in my blog, now. I was captivated by episode 13 and 14. It’s indeed a heartwarming scene. We are all having things called ‘the past’. We all have stories to tell. And at the end of the day, who are we judging other people’s story? Saying that our story is better than the others? Boasting that our method is better than the others? While we may forget to cheer on what is so called by effort, we may forget that everyone has different road to pass (like what Hong Banjang said ‘one might have bumpy road, one might have road like a highway, one might have road with lots of holes).

Journey to be ‘home’, settling down, finding what can make us happy again, are things that we may struggle. Most of the time, when we are almost in the end of the road to heal ourselves and we have met ourselves ready to embrace our beautiful future, other people might not forgive our past. It feels like we do not even deserve forgiveness. All the good things are erased by one or two mistakes. Okay, maybe 10 mistakes. But, have you ever thought that the good things can be thousands?

My journey of healing somewhat are similar. If this happened to me two years ago, when my besties rejected me i would just get inside my cave crying and will stay there until i finished sobbing. Healing is not completed in one night. Same thing goes to my healing journey, it was not completed in one night.

I remember, i sat down in Reza Gunawan class for my self healing for the things i couldn’t take it anymore. It was TAT class (Tapas Acupressure Technique) that I took for almost 6 months. Repeating forgiveness for me and for those whom I have hurt and hurt me. I have to sit down for 30 mins almost every day. Tears were my good friends back then. It’s not easy to forgive myself, from pushing myself too hard to a perfectionist. Maybe the journey can be the super bumpy road with holes for me.
Until now, every time i remember what had happened to me between 2015 – 2018 i just want to give a great big hug and tell her that she was doing great.

From Hometown cha cha cha, i can learn that every one has their own journey. Their own story.
Let’s leave their past story in the past. Let’s embrace their presence. Let’s celebrate their effort. On top of that, just be kind.

I too, have my past. I am not there anymore. Please do not look for me in my past and don’t search my past. I have left it.
I am here now, in the present. Can you just feel my presence?

Eat good food, and be happy
-Halmoni Gam Ri-

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